I’ts A New Day In My Skin – Day 97

Weight:  Didn’t weigh in the last few days.

Size: 14

Exercise:  A nap… LOL!

Well, this is the deal.  I haven’t worked out for the past few days.  Actually, since Tuesday of last week.

You know, when I think of myself, or look down at myself I see a different person it seems.   I feel good about myself, almost all of the time.  I like my body, my hair, my face, my smile, how white my teeth are, my ass, my boobs.  I don’t even think about my stomach that often, which is usually my one bother.  When I wear a bathing suit now a days I’m not even concerned about how I look.  That is probably, because I can’t see myself though.  I was thinking a while back about being in a bathing suit in front of others and I was thinking… I am fine with it, because I can’t see myself, but I feel sorry for who has to look at me.  Then I laughed!

It is a whole different story when I look at myself in the mirror sometimes though.  It isn’t my ass, it isn’t my tits, it isn’t even the cellulite!  It is this damn stomach.  I have had a flat stomach my whole life, well until now.  Even after my first 2 children it was good.  Once I gained 20 more pounds after the last two though, nope, not so much!  I’ve had 4 c-sections I try to justify on top of the 40 pounds I carry.  I try to think of the positive things… I’ve had 4 children and I have NO stretch-marks.  My tits don’t sag. I have minor wrinkles on my face.  I think that for 40 I look pretty damn good.

After thinking about the last paragraph, I think this is why I REALLY haven’t gotten this damn weight off.  I like myself.  I know I SHOULD get it off.  I’m just not in that huge of a hurry.  Is that so bad?  Some days I think no, others I think yes.  I am getting older, so I have shit to think about like heart disease … you know it’s the #1 killer in women and can happen at any time without any notice.  Women that are hanging on to more weight are more apt to getting it then the thinner women.  Then I stretch for another cocktail and another bite of food.  Sure I exercise, do yoga, eat healthy and all that good stuff.  I am perimenopausal and my hormones are crazy.  Apparently, I don’t care enough about the weight to get it off though.  So I say, oh well for now.  Maybe it will change tomorrow.

I raise another glass to myself today about feeling good about me and living a great life!  🙂

xo

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